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Here and There…Now and Then |
Henry, Dot, and Cathy
We didn’t have a big party this year, but Cathy and I stopped over to see mom this evening, since today is her 94th birthday. She’s adjusted to her new living situation quite well and we’re very pleased with the support she’s getting there. Her apartment is small but comfortable and a good size for her. As you can see, we have one of her quilts hanging on the wall behind us.
Family
Mom’s memorial service was this morning. There were a few technical hitches, such as a tree down and power lines down across the road so getting to the church was difficult for folks coming from that direction. While power had been restored around midnight, the internet connection was still out, so we were not able to life-stream the service for those who could not be there. Also, while we had a microphone and that worked for folks in the room, we were not able to get the audio fed directly into the video camera. Nevertheless, after some creative editing, we got a video with passable audio. You can read mom’s bio and find links to the video and slide show on HartleyFamily.org.
After the service, all the local family and some from out of town came to our house for the rest of the day. Others from out of town drove home the same day, but it was good to see everyone and we’re very thankful for the love and support of our family and friends.
Grandma and Laura
Cathy’s niece, Laura, arrived last night and this morning we all went to see her grandma (a.k.a. Cathy’s mom, a.k.a. Margaret). Her face really lit up when she saw Laura, and we had a really nice visit. It was a pretty whirlwind visit, though, and we took Laura directly to the Metro to get down to Union Station to catch her train back to New York in the early afternoon. We worked around the yard for the rest of the day, going inside when it started raining and then coming back out again when it stopped.
Michael and Rachel
Cathy and I drove down to Raleigh, North Carolina this morning, getting there in reasonable time. We checked into out hotel and had time to visit a municipal rose garden before getting dressed and heading to the church for Rachel and Michael’s wedding. The wedding itself was quite beautiful. The music, not surprisingly considering this was Rachel, was particularly nice. After the ceremony, we drove to the reception location and after hors d’oeuvre (including an Italian ice cart provided by Rachel’s brother) and drinks, Michael and Rachel danced their first dance as husband and wife, before we had a lovely dinner.
Family Reunion
There are certain things that make me think of my mom more than normal. The annual family reunion in northeastern North Carolina is high on the list. We’ve been going to that for years and in recent years it’s just been my mom and me, driving down the morning of the reunion, spending the night with my cousin, and then driving home the next day. This year, it was just Cathy and me and we drove down the day before. It was also on the way to our annual beach week, which is how it used to be but hasn’t been for a few years. There was a much smaller group this year, with only 26 of us able to get together. We usually try to get photos of the generations but with only 26 people there, we decided just to take a single group photo (well, we took three of them, but they’re all basically the same). In spite of the smaller size, we had a really nice visit with some of my favorite people. I’m already looking forward to next year’s reunion.
Eloise’s Birthday
In years past, we always celebrated my Uncle George’s birthday at the beach, because (obviously) that’s when it fell. With him no longer being with us, it’s nice to have a birthday to celebrate. As you will probably figure out from the candle, this is Eloise’s fifth birthday, and my cousins and their families came over to have cake and ice cream. It was a fairly raucous time with all the ‘littles’ running around and enjoying themselves. But it was a happy, little-kid type of raucous.
Kites, Ocean Isle Beach
I made a point of having my camera outside for a little while before we went down to the beach where the kids were going to fly their kites. It’s been quite hot this week and we’re all very grateful for air conditioning (even if some would have wanted it a little less cold inside). One down-side to air conditioning, though, is that when you take a camera from a 70°F environment to something over 90°F with very high humidity, it fogs up immediately and takes a while to unfog. But I planned ahead and was able to get some nice pictures of the kids running around with their kites. There was also a nice sunset.
Annual Family Beach Photo
As mentioned, we had our annual family beach week. It was quite different without mom/grandma there, but we had a good time together, both being with each other and remembering her. Dorothy was not able to stay for the full week, flying home Thursday afternoon, so we took our annual family group photo that morning. As you can possibly see, there was a little fog still on the lens or the sensor when I took this. That’s a common issue when we come out from the air conditioned indoors into the hot and humid outside.
Dorothy had originally planned to fly from Myrtle Beach Airport, where she flew into on Sunday. She found an earlier flight leaving from Wilmington and changed her reservation so she’d get home earlier and have time for band practice. It turns out she needn’t have bothered. The weather in Maryland and Pennsylvania was stormy enough that her flight was delayed and she got home considerably later than she would have on her original flight (although for all we know, that flight might have been delayed even longer). But she did get home eventually.
Cathy and I went to the New Hanover County Arboretum in Wilmington, which we really enjoyed. I’d definitely stop in again if we were in the area.
Margaret with David, Jim, Jeff, Cathy, Dorothy
This was taken the day before her actual birthday, but at 99 years, a day is only 0.28%, so I think we can round it up. David and Jim both came for the occasion, which was really nice, and Dorothy and Jeff drove down from Pennsylvania (which was also nice). We had a nice visit and Margaret was in good form for the occasion. The tiara was brought by someone for her birthday last year and we felt it was appropriate.
Yesterday we posted a similar photo on Facebook and today we read comments to her, which was nice. She also got a huge stack of cards and we got through some of them, but we saved a few more for tomorrow, her actual birthday.
Jeff, Dorothy, Anna, and Cathy
Late this afternoon Cathy and I went up to Pennsylvania to celebrate Dorothy’s birthday. We stopped in Frederick to pick up dinner, going first to Cava where we bought food for Cathy, Dorothy, Jeff, and Anna and then to Black Hog BBQ where I got some meat for myself. Not the best BBQ I’ve ever had, but not bad. I liked the smoked sausage better than the Texas brisket. Nevertheless, I’d go again and try their Arkansas brisket and smoked pit ham.
We had dinner at Jeff’s apartment and then walked through town to Domino’s Pizza where we bought Chocolate Lava Crunch Cakes. Instead of eating them inside or taking them back to Jeff’s apartment to eat them, they sat on the curb outside Domino’s and ate them there.
Silas Dressed for Halloween
Iris and Seth invited us, along with the rest of the local family and a few friends, to a Halloween party this evening. We wore costumes, but honestly it was more about getting together than about dressing up. Eloise and Silas did show us their costumes. Eloise was a rain storm, with an “umbrella cloud” and Silas dressed in with this illusion costume being carried by a skeleton. It worked pretty well and occasionally he’d move his legs, crossing and uncrossing them, which really added to the effect.
Cathy and I wore fairly basic costumes. Cathy wore a Tajik dress, an Afghan hat and an Afghan scarf. I put on my cowboy boots, tied a bandana around my neck and wore my cowboy hat. I had already been wearing a denim shirt. So I was a cowboy.
Thanksgiving
Getting everyone seated and happy for a family photo isn’t always easy. Doing it in the evening, after a bit meal, can be especially hard. Nevertheless, we managed to do it after our Thanksgiving meal today and Iris and Seth’s. Thanks to them for hosting and for providing the turkey, among other things. The kids played well together and are better and better at getting along as they grow older. That’s not to say there weren’t a few very loud moments, but that’s to be expected.
It’s lovely to be with family but it’s also sad in that it reminds me of those we no longer have with us. This is our first Thanksgiving without my mom, so that was the most notable, but as it also happened to fall on Ralph and Tsai-Hong’s anniversary he was also very much in our minds. Dad and Albert were also missed, of course. It’s good to talk about them all.
Danna, Steve, Kaien, and Maya
Christmas is a busy day for us. I know we aren’t alone in that, of course. It starts, as it has for so many years, with Cathy, Dorothy and me and now for the second time with Jeff added to that, opening our presents to each other. After that, we have our now traditional Christmas breakfast of pancakes (this time buttermilk pancakes made from scratch rather than Bisquick), steamed eggs (very much like poached but a bit easier to cook) bacon, sausage patties and links, orange juice, toast, etc. It’s actually a pretty substantial meal. After that we went to visit Cathy’s mom and sing Christmas Carols with her, which was nice.
George and Carmela drove down and the local family all came here for our big family gathering. The last few years our meal had been a pot-luck style of what we call ‘what-nots’. It’s lots of little things and frankly quite an assortment. Way too much food, of course, but very satisfying.
We didn’t take a group photo, as it would not have been likely to go well by the time we got around to it. But I did get a few nice pictures of Steve and his family, as shown here.
Henry, Cathy, Dorothy, and Jeff
We went to the 6:00 AM sunrise service at Fourth Presbyterian this morning. The forecast was for rain but we were fortunate that the rain didn’t come until the afternoon. Instead we had a very pretty sunrise, along with a lovely service. As usual, we stayed for breakfast and then the 8:00 service in the sanctuary, where the music, as well as the message, was wonderful. We came home and then went to visit Cathy’s mom and though I took pictures there, the picture I’m sharing with you is of the four of us, back at home before we changed out of our Easter best and had our Easter feast.
Iris, Eloise, Kai, Silas, and Zazu
The family all met at the property in Pennsylvania for a weekend campout today. At one point, a bunch of us walked to the big oak tree (The Omar Bradley Oak). After we were there a little while, Iris asked if I knew the way to the big rocks that she remembered from her childhood. I said that I did and we headed that way.
Dorothy has begun making a few trails, including one to those rocks, although there are some trees down partially blocking the trails. So, there is always work to be done. We got to the rocks, however, and took some photos before heading back to the cabin.